Survival
by XxxFIVEbyFIVExxX
Summary: Buffy feels that she is haunted by Spike and Angel. She has to find a way to get them back. During her dreams she ascertains they are both human now.Please read and review.
1. The Calls

Survival

DISCLAIMER':- None of the characters belong to me which sucks ! Joss and all connected to the Series have been made oodles of cash and I won't make a penny! I do this for fun only!

Note:- This is my third story and it's based after Not Fade Away. Buffy is being ' Haunted' by both the vampires.Please read and review .

Chapter One

"Will you stop stalking me , I know your there, just come out of the shadows and face me" Buffy swung herself round expecting to face the vampire that had been tailing her for days.The tingling sensation faded, she knew it had slunk off to come back and 'haunt' her again .She shrugged and continued on her way back to her house. The night had been a long and arduous one , work , slay , work again. Willow and Xan would pester her to go out and socialise with them of that she was sure. She hung up her coat and threw her bag on the sofa , throwing herself onto the sofa and glancing at the answer machine. " No doubt that's them " she huffed as she dragged her ass off the couch to see that she had recieved six calls today. " Get it over with", she pushed the play button.

"Hey Buff, you actually going to take some time to have fun and chill out with us, it's been a week since we last saw you , Xander's worried about you, we're all worried Buffy. Come out with us tonight . We'll all be at the usual place at about nine, just in case you feel up to it. I gotta go , Andrew's holding a seminar for some of the potential wicca's amungst the slayerettes, and you just know one of them's going to turn him into something" Willow giggled at the thought and then returned to her message " Anyway, I hope to see you later , Bye"

Buffy deleted the message and waited for the rest, two of which were sales reps trying to sell home insurance. Like she could afford that! The machine beeped and then went on to play the next message. It beeped the start of it and then , nothing , silence. Background noise gave nothing away , Buffy shrugged and hovered her finger over the delete button. " So , it was probably a vamp that made the call to intimidate her, like it would? Then she heard it.

"Buffy"

It was weak , tired and in pain. She had heard his voice like that many times.

"Spike?"

No it couldn't be. She knew he was dead. It was his voice though, wasn't it ? She played the message it again... nothing.

"Okay ... much weirdness, must have been my tiredness playing tricks"

She saved the message and then listened to the next one.

"Buffy "

This was getting to weird , even for her, and that's where she lived , in the weirdness.Angel's voice had sounded just as it had the day he had his soul returned to him, just before she sent him to hell. Why is she getting ghostly calls from ghosts? First it was Spike's voice, now it's Angel's. Get a grip, your dreaming , must be, you came home and you fell asleep on the couch. She slapped herself mentally.

Again she replayed the message and nothing . Buffy looked at the machine and saw the zero in the messages window. She flopped back on the sofa " I'll bring it up with Gile's when I call him later.That was the last thing she thought as she slipped into a deep sleep.It didn't take long for her to start dreaming.

It started the same as it always did, Spike in the Hellmouth, in the pillar of sunlight that streamed through the basement from above, the amulet sending rays of said sunlight beaming and dancing it's way through the cavern, killing the ubervamps.Her heart rate and breathing increased, not that she knew that of course. Slight whimpers left her and she shifted on the couch. The dream then continued to show Angel fighting hoards of demons with Spike by his side. Although it didn't come with a time and date , she knew it was after the Hellmouth incident.She saw the fight play out in her mind and saw the two vampires die at the hands of the demons, Angel being decapitated and Spike being staked.The dreams weren't just visual , they came with the whole kit and caboodle, smells and tastes, audio and feeling. This seemed very real to her, but it couldn't be , could it? Spike had 'died' for her, in the pit of hell , Angel had died at the hands of the Black Thorn. The end of the dream always ended the same as well , with both vampires calling her name. Even in her sleep she was torn between them.That's when she would snap out it and wake up, soaked with sweat and breathing heavy, her heart thumping in her chest and feeling like it was about to burst.

Buffy walked into the kitchen of her new house and ran the cold tap. Once it was icy cold she held her hands under it and splashed the cool liquid over her face. She filled a glass up with water and headed into the lounge again. She sat on the couch and picked up the remote and turned on the television, propping her feet on the coffee table. God this is the worst show on tv and yet I'm watching it .Romance is so over rated she thought with a sigh. Buffy glanced at the clock and decided that , seen as it was mid afternoon in London , she would call Giles. She knew he would fluster and probably try and push it aside as some futile need for her vampires.Oh well best to get it over with.

The phone rang for a few minutes before Andrew finally answered. He was trying to mimick an English accent and failing miserably. Still , he did bring a smile to Buffy's face .

"Hey Andrew, still trying to perfect the James Bond thing then?More like Johnny English she thought.

" Hello Buffy , vampyr slayer extraordinaire, what may I do to service your needs at this time"

Buffy's eyes rolled as she shook her head

"Is Giles there, I need to talk to him, and before you ask , it's personal"

"I'll put you through to his extention, just hold Buffy"

"Thanks Andrew" She was hoping Giles would pick up straight away , as Andrew was obviously still on the line as well , and would only want more of a conversation.Luckily Giles was at his desk and picked up immediately.

"How good to hear from you my dear, How's things?"

"There Okay , could be better , you know how thing's tend to work out for me. But not much with the complaining. I rang as I seem to be suffering from major hauntings of the Spike and Angel kind. "

" I doubt they are 'hauntings' Buffy, as you well know , once a vampire has been dusted, they don't rise again, they have no regenerative powers"

"Spike did"

"Ah yes well , that was a very rare and unpresidented case, fuelled by the mystical , on behalf of Wolfram and Hart"

"Which both of the were working for at the time of their deaths"

She could tell Giles had now left his seat behind his desk and that he was now pacing, also, thinking how he could clean his glasses while juggling the phone.

"Tell me , I need more detail"

Buffy told him that she could sense them and felt as if she was being stalked and about the phone messages

" Do you still have the message on your answer machine?"

"Yes , like I was going to erase them. Puh-lease I know how anal you are when it comes to the weird and wacky. But that's just the thing , when I played the message back , they weren't there anymore, as in no longer vocal."

"Send me the recordings via e-mail and I will go over them and report back to you by tonight Buffy. As for the stalking, I am more than sure it's probably just another vampire ."

"No, it definately feels like Spike, and it was his M.O"

"Well if it is his essence then it's not going to be corporeal , so he can't hurt you"

"I doubt he would try it even if he could, I don't get those vibes from it, him, it just , well it gives the wiggins"

"As I doubt it is them I shouldn't worry yourself too much Buffy"

" Yeah , cos it's not like those two come back from the dead much is it? Hell didn't even keep Angel from returning and Spike had his share of Hellmouthy fireball death and he came back and worked for previously kicked out of hell vamp"

"Well I won't be able to assertain whether it is Angel and Spike, until you have provided me with the recordings and I suggest for your own piece of mind , you do that as soon as possible Buffy"

"Okay, I will go and do that now. Just let me know what you find out soon as"

"Goodnight Buffy"

"Night"

She hung up and removed the tape from the machine. I am so not in the mood for this she thought. Typical of those two crazy assed vamps to cause me even more angst, It's not enough that they're dead, ooooh no they got to haunt me.

Buffy yawned and headed upstairs to load the messages onto her laptop . Once she had copied the recording, she mailed it to Giles. She thought back to Angel's death and his return, and then to Spike's pillar of fire death. What was it with the vampires that were part of the Order of Aurelius? Why do they always end up revived after their deaths? Angel had told her about Darla being raised by Wolfram and Hart. Was it possible for Wolfram and Hart to have some kind of link to the actual blood line of the vampires? "Okay I am so not going to get any sleep now , brains working overtime and for me , that's not leading anywhere good."

Buffy decided to have a shower before she retired to bed.'Let's hope this chills the inner turmoil enough to get me to snoozeville'. The shower eased her tired aching muscles and the scent of her lavender helped her mind relax a little.She climbed into bed and sighed. It wasn't long before she had drifted off to sleep.

She could smell the ashes , hear his laughter as he died. A brilliant bright flash of light and he was there, walking out in the sunlight. It wasn't a place she recognised, but who cared? Spike was alive here.She was sat on a cliff top , a forest behind her , the sun high up in the sky , she bathed in the warmth of it. She sensed him approach her. She stood up , still looking out over the cliff . His arms wrapped around her waist , his body pressed against her back, his chin resting on her shoulder.

' I missed you' his breath was hot against her ear

' Where are we? '

' Don't rightly know pet, can't seem to care neither' He trailed kisses down her neck

' You died '

' Yeah, kinda knew that , miss state the obvious'

'So why are we here? Why do I still feel you? '

'Can't just enjoy the dreams can ya slayer '

A breeze whisked around the pair , making her hair whip up and her skirt wrap around her legs. Spike lifted his nose to it and breathed in deeply.

' You still smell delicious '

' I need to find you '

' I'm righ' here waitin'

' If your here, then where is Angel '

His hold on her slipped

' Dunno and don' care '

Buffy turned to face him

The scenery blinked around them and they were stood in a dark pit, something caught her eye and she walked over to it. She bent down to pick it up. Half buried , it was the amulet. As she reached for it a hand shot up through rubble, grasping her wrist.Spike pulled her back , pulling the arm through the soil . They stood watching as a second hand came out through the loose soil, followed by a head and a body.

Angel

'I'm ... ALIVE!'

' Okay now consider me stunned! '

' What are you doin' ere ' Spike shot off

' Same thing you are dumbass' Angel sneered

' Great, just what I need , even in my dreams you two bicker like little old ladies'

'Buffy' Angel held her in his arms.

'Oi !'

' So , any idea why we're here Angel?'

'Buffy backed out of his embrace.

' I guess it has something to do with the Shanshu '

' I thought you signed it over and I thought it would make one of us a real boy, not like this though '

' You never were a great thinker Spike '

' Shanshu? What's with that? ' Buffy was curious now.

' Prophecy luv, vampire with a soul gets his redemption by becoming human again. Only the wanker 'ere thought it meant him and signed it over to the lawyers. Means that it should be me, so why the bloody hell he's 'ere beats me'

Buffy pauses to look at Angel for confirmation

' It's true , only not the part where it's Spike's '

' I got meself a shiny soul and hello , vampire , think that makes me qualify , although not vampire now 'course'

' Could you two just shut up and help me work this out before I wake up. So Shanshu, human, but why in my dreams? '

'You must be our link to the mortal world ' Angel offered up

' And the Shanshu was supposed to be for one , not both , so how come your both human here? '

' Saved the world ...again' Spike said as he approached Buffy again , snaking his arm around her waist.

Angel rolled his eyes

' I'll get Gile's straight on it when I wake up'

The same blinking around them and then they were in the alley

' Still not getting used to this ' Buffy snipped ' Where the hell are we now? '

' This would be the place we died again , the alley in L.A.' Spike said

' Tell me to never book a tour with your guides again, the sightseeing sucks'

Both Angel and Spike shook their heads and smiled

' Anything seem like a clue to you both? '

' Nothin' 'ere, 'cept demon goo' Spike was bent down running it through his fingers

Angel had wandered through the carcusses of the various demons

' Over here ' he called to therm

'What's that?' Buffy asked , pointing at the demon

' It's a Morah, specifically designed to regenorate itself and anyone that comes into contact with it's blood'

' I fought one o' them , had a nasty gash in me side at the time' Spike said

' I think we now know why both of us are human here , it regenorated you Spike" Angel nudged the demon with his boot " I came across them before. It was supposed to bring about the end of days"

"Erm big huge apocolypse, been there done that and I think I can say that this was the one it was yappin' 'bout, seen as it's ere an all"

"Spike's right for once" Angel conceded

"Okay, still doesn't tell me how I get you both back does it" the slayer sighed.

Both Angel and Spike went to her side. Both of them rolled their eyes at the other.

"For god sake will you both stop with the love sick puppy act."

"But you with the cookie dough and and the baking and the some day and I get to eat the cookie dough" Angel blurted out, not caring that it made him sound like a ten year old.

Spike laughed until he had tears in his eyes.

"Shut it Spike" Angel's anger evident

"Can both of you please cut it out. " Buffy inspected the demon " So, Angel , how did you kill this demon?"

"Smash the jewel on it's head. But the one I encountered before said for one that falls , more will rise"

"One thing we haven't really taken into consideration, Wolfram and bloody Hart" Spike said

It was at that point Buffy woke up.


	2. Emails and Dimensions

A/N :- I hope you are reading this and enjoying this story. I would love to get your feedback and reviews to let me know! So, onto Chapter two!

Disclaimer :- Still not owning the characters so don't sue me.

Chapter Two

Buffy showered and got dressed ready for her day. She didn't feel rested at all , guess that what comes with the realistic dreams, she thought. After three cups of strong coffee, she headed for the door and picked up the keys off the plant stand.Buffy made her way to Willow's. Maybe she could do some kind of spell to help her, or them, she thought . Knowing how Xander felt about the two vampires , she hoped he would be at work, it would be hard enough to convince Willow that she was not going crazy and that she needed her help , without him there to persuade her that she shouldn't help. If Angel and Spike were caught between worlds , Buffy would do anything she could to get them back.

She pulled the car up on Willow's driveway and walked to the front door. It opened before she could knock. Willow stood there with a huge grin on her face.

"Well , hello there stranger!"

"Ha Ha , hows everything?" Buffy smiled

Willow backed out of the doorway so that Buffy could walk into the house. She followed Buffy in and sat on the couch.

"I'm good, 'course I'd be better if Anya didn't stay here with Xander and bore me with talk of the new Magic shop's profit margin. How's things with you?"

"Oh unno me, the usual, slay , work , get mysterious phone calls from Spike and Angel from beyond the grave"

"Oh that's good then " A pause " What!!!"

" I need Willow type help"

"Rewind... calls from beyond the grave ... Angel and Spike?"

"Yup. I got Giles working the messages , see that they are there and I'm not losing my mind, but yeah"

"You know I'll help if I can , but are you sure it's them Buffy?"

"Slayer type dreams seem to be backing them up and then there's the spooky stalking when I'm on patrol"

Willow shuddered

Buffy raised her eyebrows.

"Tell me what the messages say and what happens in the dreams, have you told Giles about them?" After a beat " You don't get groiny with them do you , cos you could just leave that part out"

Buffy sniggered " No , definitely not with the groiny action, your safe"

"Phew!"

The two girls smiled

"Well it started with the stalking, It was Spike. I could sense him , it's weird but it was like the tingling I used to get with him.My slayer sense was going off and there were no vamps around. I got home and there were these messages on the answer phone. I got yours and then there were the two messages , one from Spike and one from Angel. Totally wigged me out. They both just kinda whispered my name , but it was like a painful almost dead like whisper."

Buffy started to cry and wiped the tears away with her hand. She looked at Willow and gave her a ' I'm okay ' smile.

"That sounds like they are being anchored here , like their essence is trapped here and its cos of you Buffy"

"Great!"

"No , it's not a bad thing , well depends on your point of view really. Did the dreams give anything away?"

Buffy sunk into Willows pillows and sighed

"There lies another whole angst fest. Spike was there and it started with this romantic setting and his arms around me and then before I knew it we were in this cavern and Angel was crawling up through the earth and then he had his arms around me and I felt safe and then they were going on about this soupshoe prophecy or something and arguing over who gets it in the end." she took a deep breath after her babble

"Oh boy , and what's this prophecy about , did they tell you?"

"One of them gets to be human apparently"

"Oh wow that's like a big deal Buffy! But only one?"

"You think... The way they were behaving you wouldn't think so... that's sarcasm by the way... There was also another blip and we ended up where their final battle was and ewwww. There was this demon , a morah I think that's what Angel called it. Spike and Angel said it can restore them back to human."

" That's good then isn't it, if one gets all prophesised then the other one can still be made human, right?"

"Doesn't work that way , for the morah demons blood to work they have to be coporeal to start with"

"God ... that seems totally unfair.. which one should be made human? Do you have a preference Buff?"

"Why ask me ?, This sucks, how can I choose? I loved , loved Angel but then there's Spike" Buffy threw herself back on the pillows and growled angrily into another pillow.

"I don't envy you . I could contact the covern and see if they have any information and find out if there is anything I can do"

"Thanks Will , I would really appreciate that"

"S'ok. Did Xander tell you the big news?" Willow sat on the edge of the bed

"Nope. Are they getting married again , or well trying to " Buffy frowned as her memory replayed the last wedding fiasco.

"No, someone has offered to buy Sunnydale and rebuild there. His boss said that if the mysterious buyer gets permission , his team will have the contract to do all the work"

"Oh God! How stupid are people? Xander wouldn't do it would he?" Buffy's voice sounded panicked

"I don't know . He did say it was all speculation at the moment"

"Last thing I need is someone uncovering the bloody seal and trying to open it again"

"I'm feeling you there"

"Comforting"

"I thought so!"

The two girls sat in silence. Willow was busy trying to contemplated her course of action She didn't want to see her friend driven mad by her ghosts.She hoped that the covern would come up with a way to save the two heroic vampires. True, Angel had worked for the evil lawyers at the time of his death , and so had Spike, but that didn't mean that they had to stay the way they were , did it?

Buffy was deep in thought as well. She was trying to work out which one of her fallen lovers would deserve the Shanshu to come true for them. Angel had achieved alot at his detective agency and fighting by her side in Sunnydale,working with the Powers That Be.His spotless record for doing good was marred when he took the opportunity to become C.E.O of Wolfram And Hart, which happened to be evil central in L.A. Spike had originally come into her life with the pretence of killing his third Slayer. Since the Initiative had implanted him with a behaviour modification chip , he had ' stopped chasing the other puppies' and had in fact , helped her on occasion. Then after her death , he had started to care, love her even. A snub from her and an attempted rape, forced him to get a soul and he had sacrificed himself for the greater good , and for her.His shot at redemption.Once he was recoporealised he went to work for Angel at said evil law firm, What a fine pair of heroes they turned out to be!

So, Buffy was still confused and still nowhere near finding out the answers to her many questions. This was not how the Slayer liked things and a tired, confused and emotional Slayer always meant angst. Bloody vampires , she thought.

" I could try and contact the Powers myself" Willow said chirpily

"Do you even know if you can do that? I thought they existed on another plain?"

"They do , but with the new meditation exercises and with a spell , I should be able to do it. We would just have to keep it from Giles."

"When can we do it?"

"I'll find the spell and get anything we need for it tonight and I'll come over later, if that's okay?"

"That would great Will, sooner I get this sorted the better I'll sleep"

Willow and Buffy stood contemplating the spell and both hoping it would give them the answers Buffy needed to sort this situation out. Whilst this was going on, Buffy would find it hard to focus on anything else and that could be dangerous for her. Willow had known both vampires and had respect for Spike, Angel stirred up a whole barrage of different emotions due largely by the times he had reverted back to his alter ego. But, Willow wasn't one to bare grudges... mostly. Out of the two vampires Willow knew her loyalties laid with Spike, he had shown Buffy the meaning of devotion and true love, something Buffy herself had never truly felt before, even with Angel.Yet Buffy still hung on to Angel and their memories like it had been, why was that? Yep, Willow thought , I so need to get this sorted out before Buffy ends up convincing herself that Angel is the better vamp and kicks poor Spike to the curb ... again.

"Deep in thought there Will... care to share"

Snapping out her trance like state ,Willow looked at Buffy with an almost sympathetic gaze " Just thinking about Spike and Angel, who knows where their essences are , and also, I feel sorry for Spike, he died twice this year, gotta be a bummer for him unno."

"Can't be easy for either of them . I don't think I can make the choice Willow. This is so hard". Buffy's voice broke ."Why can't someone just make the choice for me?"

"Hopefully, with the covern and my chat with the Powers That Be later , we should have some answers. I wish there was more I could do for you Buff" Willow looked at her hands

"S'ok, lets see what later brings us"

Buffy got home and noticed her answer machine blinking. She threw her bag down and hit the play button

"Buffy, help me please"

Oh God, it's happening again, Spike was calling out to her. She just hoped that Willow could pull the spell off tonight. Buffy fell to the floor crying.

Willow looked at the clock above the fire and picked up the phone, it was still early in the morning over in England, but time was of the essence right now and so Willow dialled the coverns number.

"Agthena? Hi it's um Willow Rosenberg"

"Hello young Willow how are you?"

"I'm very well thank you. How are you and my sisters?"

"We are well. I'm glad you called us , we have been watching the energy surrounding the Warrior and since the Hellmouth has been destroyed, we have noticed a munber of disruptions. Is this why you have contacted us?"

"Might be related, I'm not sure. The Slayer has been getting weird calls from both Angel and Spike and she has been having prophetic dreams about them. We believe that we are somehow supposed to resurrect them"

"We concur young one, but only one can truly be given life. The choice is not the Warriors, but it lays with the true Powers. You must accept that the Warrior may not like the choice "

"Do you know which one it is?"

"That I cannot tell, only a wise one can tell you"

"Can you help us talk to the Powers?"

"All you need to know is in the Book of Grantis. Beware Willow, they do not take kindly to being disturbed, only a true heart can enter they're palace and return"

"Thank you Agthena. Blessed be"

"Blessed be child, and Willow?

"Yes"

"Take care"

"You too"

Willow hung up and smiled, Buffy would be happier now, all Willow had to do is find that darn book.

Xander walked into his office and threw the portfolio onto his desk. The idiots were going ahead with the proposed 'New Sunnydale'. Why don't people ever learn from past mistakes. He was sure that there was some big evil behind the plan. He would warn Buffy later and hopefully , they would find out who it was and why. After a good old fashioned ass kicking by the Slayer, they would pack up and forget there ever was a Sunnydale and a Hellmouth!.

So, he rang Buffy and informed her. Her voice had been husky and she sounded down. Pretty much the norm for her since Spike had been sacrificed he thought. Maybe this new threat would take her mind off him for a while.Buffy had sworn and cursed and ranted about the news. Xander told her he would find a way to stall the project and buy her some time, but he couldn't risk losing his job over it and it would be better to have him on the job so that he could report back. She agreed and they hung up.

Willow was due and she had found the book, which was in Giles' private collection that had been shipped to the new Magic Shop. How lucky was that she thought.Buffy went online to check her email and saw that Giles had gotten back to her about the calls.Her hand shook as she hovered the curser over the open tab. Did she really want to know? Buffy chastised herself and clicked on open.

Dearest Buffy,

I have analysed the tape recordings and whist I didn't actually hear the voices you claim are on here, I did find a background distortion that was odd. I have manipulated the sound and I have sent it back as an attachment, please play it after you have read this.

The one that you say is from Angel has a very different signiture than the one from Spike. After hearing the difference in the dream sequence that you had, it appeared that Spike appeared to you bathed in sunlight and Angel crawled from the earth in darkness. I believe this is significant Buffy. Once you hear the recording you will understand. Please take care Buffy and I shall be making my way back to you as soon as possible.

Love

Giles

Buffy hadn't thought of her dream in that way and could see Giles' point. She had an ominus feeling regarding the attachment and was in two minds as to whether she should play it. Shrugging ,she downloaded the file and then hit play on the one that had been tagged as ' Spike 1'

The noise was like a quiet hum, a throbbing almost heartbeat like . It reminded her of something. It felt peaceful. It felt like ... he couldn't be, could he? She had been there, albeit briefly.

Reeling from Spikes recording she was even more cautious about Angels. Should she listen and did she really want to know? She answered herself.

"Yes you should listen and no you don't want to know, but you have to do this"

She clicked on the file

The noise was deafening and screams could be heard in the background. Maniacal laughter and grunts echoed through her speakers and she felt cold, empty and sick. There was no doubt in her mind where Angel was. It was unfair , he didn't deserve this, no matter what he had done, he had done what had been asked and he had helped the helpless as he said he would. How could the Powers say this was his reward? Anger filled her and she threw a floppy disc at the screen. It was a pathetic gesture but it was better than the one she had wanted to do.

Buffy shut the pc down and went to get herself something to eat. She tried not to think about Spike or Angel but she was just kidding herself, they filled most of her thoughts even when she was asleep. She just hoped that Willow would get there soon.She sat on her couch and flicked through the channels, nothing could hold her attention so she turned the tv off and ate in silence.

Buffy had just washed up her plate and cutlery when Willow came in through the back door. They hugged and walked into the lounge .Willow perched on the edge of the chair while Buffy chose to sit on the couch.

"So, did you manage to find anything out?" Buffy asked

"Right, yes , I rang the covern and they are aware of something happening here and it's centred around you.I have the book that will help us to see the Powers but they gav me a warning, something about only the true of heart can go and return from their palace"

"So their like royalty or something?" Buffy frowned and huffed

"No, in ancient times Gods and Godesses had palaces , normally built by the people that worshipped them Buffy, the Powers are as old as time itself"

"Right, old guys that live in mystical palaces " she nodded "What else did you find out?"

Willow paused for a while, not wanting to tell Buffy what the covern had said regarding the resurrection . Finally Willow bit the bullet, hoping it wouldn't misfire and blow up in her face.

"They said that only one can be resurrected and that the choice wasn't yours to make.Agthena also said you might not like the choice, but you have to bare with it."

"What? So why am I the one they ask for and why am I even involved?" she paced the room " I was getting a life back, I'm not the only Slayer now, I could devote time to Dawnie and study and make something of my life. Why can't I just be that normal girl now? Why do I have to have vampires and Powers that Be and hellmouths making my every waking moment a misery"

Buffy dropped to the floor crying again "It's not fair Will... I just want normal, is that too much to ask for?"

"Buffy" Willow stroked her hair and soothed the weeping Slayer " You are still the pure essence of the Slayer, regardless of how many there are now, Buffy, you can't have normal, not in the same way as maybe Dawn can. The vampires your talking about were somehow meant to be your destiny, well one was, not sure which one though, and I think this is s'posed to show us who it is, and return them to you. I think them dying was a huge mistake and this is a way of correcting that mistake. "

Buffy looked up at her best friend, Willow was right , as per usual. Buffy dried off her tears and sat up, managing a small smile . "This book, does it tell us when we have to do the ritual or whatever it is I need to do?"

"You can do it whenever you want, time is irrelevant there"

"Right, lets do it then Will"

Buffy slid a stake in her waistband and took in a deep breath "Lets hope I have a pure heart or else your lumbered with a stroppy fifteen year old" she smiled at Willow and waited for Willow to perform the ritual.

Willow sat on the floor and threw some bones wrapped in herbs into a bowl and chanted some language that Buffy didn't recognise. Willow then lit some sage and put that in the bowl along with a crystal . The crystal glowed and Willow handed it to Buffy.As soon as the crystal was in Buffy's palm, she saw a blinding white light.

Buffy put her arm across her face to try and block the blinding white light from her eyes , she tried to focus and squinted. Two forms came into focus and she blinked to get her eyes accustomed to the light and to focus on them.

"Warrior, you come in search of answers that only we hold" the beings spoke at the same time

"Yes"

"Do you accept that you cannot choose your knight?"

"Yes" Buffy answered but she didn't truly accept it.

"You wish it could be different and you could have both?"

"I guess, I'm confused" Buffy shuffled her feet and looked at the beings before her.

They were pretty. Blue and gold , dressed in toga's and ornate jewellery, their eyes dark and glassy.

"Then it is a wise thing that the choice is not yours to make"

"Possibly, they both died fighting for your cause, it's not fair that one won't be resurrected, Angel doesn't deserve to stay in hell and..."

"William doesn't deserve to be in heaven.. is that what you think? "

"No, no he does, he really does" tears fell from Buffy's eyes

"Ah, for you it is about love, the one you consider your soul mate"

Buffy's head snapped up to look at them and she frowned

"You mean Angel?"

"The vampire that approached us to take back time and your memories of a day he had as a human,yes we mean him."

"I'm confused, he wouldn't do that , he wouldn't " Buffys face was slick from the tears, made worse by the claim they had just made.

"He did it to protect you, or so he said. That and his own need to be important. He couldn't stand to be a human and not have power"

"Your wrong!" Buffy wiped her face on her sleeve "He loved me, he wouldn't do that to me"

The male walked forward and touched Buffy's forehead. A light flashed around her and she saw the day replay in her head, like a tape on fast forward.Her heart sunk. What surprised her was that it didn't hurt as bad as she thought it would. In truth, Buffy thought she would have been heartbroken.

Call it an Epiphany.

She didn't love Angel as much as she thought she did.

He wasn't her true love, never had been.

She had romantisized their relationship because she had been young and impressionable.

He wasn't her soul mate.

She hate him a little for that.

Would Spike ever forgive her?

The female drew Buffy into her arms .

" Love plays with your mind and soul and twists itself into something new .You realise your path was not with the one called Angelus. He was never to be our true champion. We used him to fight it is true but we realised our mistake, that is why he left you. His heart was not pure enough."

"Spikes was, you gave him to me"

"We learnt from our mistake, we knew his heart was pure, but we also knew that he had to make the choice. He had to choose to be your soul mate and champion."

"And he did choose"

"Yes" they said in unison "And he loved"

"But I didn't love him back, not in the way he wanted" Buffy looked up and swallowed hard "I was a fool"

"You are not the one to blame, we have orchestrated these events to remedy this injustice"

"So will Spike be resurrected?"

Before she could get the answer she was returned to her lounge and stood in front of Willow , blinking from the change in brightness.

She was angry, she still had not been told which of the vampires would be returned to her and she felt even more confused about that fact. She felt clearer about her feelings though and should she ever see Angel again, she was going to ram a stake through his selfish and cold heart. If only there was a way to know which one would return.

Spike sat on his butt smoking a fag. He watched his girl go through a miriade of emotions. He had been in this dimension? Heaven? Wherever he was, didn't matter, he had been here long enough to be bored. he had found out that he could focus on her and see her, watch her life and keep himself amused. But it was torture.Blissful torture. Until she admitted her love for him.

Angel was doing the same thing, only his was forced on him. It was part of his own private hell. Watching the girl he loved go through this was tearing him apart. Just as it was supposed to. It was made worse to hear her declare her love for his wayward and highly annoying childe. His heart broke and he decended into a new hell.


	3. Back into Hell

Chapter 3

Buffy dropped the crystal and fell back. Her body felt light and as if she had no bones in her torso. Jello, she was human jello. She saw Willow hovering over her and she smiled, sniggered and the rolled over to get up. Her arms still felt a little weak, but they supported her for the most part.

"It was amazing Will, they really are pretty, told me Angel wasn't my champion, they made him go, so you see , he did love me, sort of, it wasn't his choice.Spike was my champion."

"So will they help you?"

"Kinda missed that bit as they sent me back."

"Did they hint?"

" They told me all about Angel and let's just say I see him in a different light now.But they told me that Spike was pure and he was my soul mate, so I guess they're sending Spike back to me" she beamed

"I thought Angel was your soul mate?"

"So did they but they made a mistake, Will, I saw it , he took a day back, Angel was human and he wanted to go back to being a vampire, he changed the day and stayed a vampire, even though it meant he couldn't be with me"

Willow automatically hugged Buffy, waiting for the tears to fall.

None did.

"Do you think Spike would have done that?"

"Spike was egotistical and loved the power he had but he was also a fool when it came to love, so yes I think he would have chosen love and humanity over being a vampire with power. He would have chosen me. God that makes me sound like such a big head"

"When do you think they'll send them back?"

"No idea, something inside me is saying we should go back to Sunnydale"

"What's left of it"

"Let's go "

Willow helped Buffy to stand and they sat down, back to the devastation , the battleground that claimed so much and changed history.

Giles arrived a short time after they had packed the car. Dawnie stood against the door to the kitchen , pouting.

"Dawnie get over it okay, it's too dangerous, your staying"

"I always stay, and if it's a danger factor that's bothering you, then, then why did you let me in on the fight with the First hmm?"

Okay, Buffy had no answer to that but that didn't mean she had to cave in

"Your not coming"

"So I stay with captain one eye and get to hear how his life sucks now, oh the fun"

"Acting like a brat, not the way to persuade me to let you come, not that you can"

Willow stroked Dawns hair "Dawn, we're going to the hellmouth again and we don't know what we'll find there, and if we do find Spike, we don't know what state he'll be in"

Dawn gave in , she still glared at Buffy "If she had said that to start with I would have understood , okay go, I'll stay , but you better bring him back or I'll kick your shins again" she smiled

Buffy smiled, something she hadn't done in such a long time. She walked into the kitchen , where Giles was making a cup of tea.How unusual she thought.

"You leaving now?" he looked at his watch.

"Yeah, we want to make good time and if they are going to ressurrect him, we think that would be where they would send him, or he'd appear, not sure on the specifics, but anyway, I'll get up to speed when we get back"

"Very well Buffy, any idea how long you will be?"

"Hopefully back before dawn, he'll still be a vampire Giles so, I don't intend to vacation there that's for sure.Camping on the hellmouths crater, not Buffy's idea of a good time" she kissed his cheek and met Willow by the front door. Xander hugged them and then wrapped his arms around Dawn protectively.

"We'll see you guys soon." they waved as they got in the car.

Once they were settled into the car they both sighed

"We sure we should do this?" Willow asked

"No, I'm not, I never thought I'd go back, but it's Spike"

"We best motor then "

The drive was great, their spirits were high and they talked, something the best friends hadn't done since dark and veiny Willow. They felt like Thelma and Louise, only not with the bad. The scythe was in the boot just in case they had any action and Willow had done a protection spell, mostly due to Buffy's driving, she joked.

The roads leading to Sunnydale were empty, a few sightseers travelled there but that had mostly died off now. The diner close to Sunnydale was packed but they managed to get a table. The girls ate and then rushed to get back on the road. Buffy was getting anxious as they passed a sign that told them they were five miles from Sunnydale.

Buffy went quiet.

"Buffy? You okay?"

"We're going back, what if he doesn't come back?"

Willow didn't know what to say, she hadn't been there to interpret the Powers words and she had no clue why Buffy felt drawn back here, she just hoped she was right "Then we keep searching til we find him"

Then it occured to Buffy, what if he comes back in the alley where he fought alongside Angel?

No he won't, that wasn't his fight, he wasn't supposed to be there.

He was meant to die a hero for me and that's where he'll come back.

He better.

The Sunnydale sign was back. Willow stopped the car beside it and pointed "They must have put it back for prosperity or something."

"Yeah cos Sunnydale, prosperous "

They laughed, but not the happy type of laugh they had enjoyed before.This was a sobering sight. A huge hole in the world.

Buffy went to the back seat and pulled out the scythe.

"I'm going in"

She slung the scythe over her shoulder using the sheath that Xander had made for it, and tightened the rope. Willow checked her rope and nodded. Absailing wasn't on Buffy or Willows list of hobbies but it was the safest way to get down there.

They had cleared a large distance when a voice shouted down to them

"You planning on going all the way in?" Willow asked , looking down into a bottomless pit.

"As far down as we can, how long are the ropes?"

"Not sure"

" I could always teleport us down and out again"

Buffy stared at Willow "You tell me this now?"

"You seemed to have your heart set on the absailing, and you said you hadn't done it since the initiative "

"Will, I love you but can we just do the zip zap , maybe we can get home before daylight"

Willow concentrated and took Buffy's hand, they blinked out and back in again , ending up in a small opening , deep inside the crator.

"Wow, this is the place I saw in my slayer dream"

They switched on their torches and shone them around. It looked like the shelf in the cave that they had fought on, the ravine that had been below them had been filled in .Buffy shone the torch behind her and saw the beginning of the stairs that lead up and out of the hellmouth. There against the wall were the scorch marks.The place Spike had died.

Buffy walked towards it and just looked. It was obvious he wasn't there in the ravine. Buffy huffed and turned back to Willow. Slowly she walked back towards her .They stood in silence. The mood, the place , the memories, all very sombre and they clung to each other.

A roar, a deep gutteral roar.

Buffy flipped the scythe round and took it out of the sheath , and held it aloft, ready for attack.

There were Turok Han that had survived.That is what they both thought. They spun slowly, stood back to back and watched for the beasts to attack.

Willow mumbled something about a spell that could imitate sunshine and would probably confuse them or even kill them. Then Buffy would have a chance to at least slay some of them and survive.

"You can't Will, just in case Angel or Spike are here, if they're vamps still, you'll kill them again before we get them back"

"Just say the word and I'll do it"

"Thanks, here we go!"

The first Turok attacked and Buffy beheaded the feral creature with little effort, the scythe slicing through it's neck like it was butter. Two more stood back and watched as the first one disintergrated to ash. Any pretence of these creatures being stupid was quickly remedied, as the two attacked together and watched the scythe closely. One managed to claw across Buffy's chest and into her sides, injuring her ribs . Buffy hissed and looked at the injury , and got mad, really mad. The two Turok Hans circled her , licking their lups and snarling at her, both ignoring Willow. The Slayer was their prey . Buffy watched as Willow started to chant , swinging the scythe out to keep the ancient vampires at bay. One of the Turoks lost it's control, if you can say that they had control, and pounced on the Slayer, knocking her to the ground.Her vulnerable position meant that the other creature leapt at her also, giving them the edge. The first turok punched at Buffy's face and torso, while the other bit down into her thigh.

Buffy screamed and Willow shouted

"Acorum!" ( Come)

She held out her arm and her hand started to glow. The ball of orange light grew and finally left her hand and shot toward the turok han.

The dust settled over Buffy and she frantically brushed it off before standing.

A little light headed but otherwise fit Slayer stared at Willow.

"Thanks for that, I doubt I'd of gotten them without you"

"It's okay Buffy, but I doubt they are the only ones left, can we get out of here now?"

Buffy took one last look around

"Yeah let's go, I was stupid to think that they , he , would come back, maybe it is all in my head "

"I don't think so Buffy, I keep feeling like there's something we missed , I just can't put my finger on it"

"Come on, let's get out of here, I so need a shower now, vamp dust gets in all the wrong places"

The two girls walked back up into the destruction and out onto the road out of Sunnydale. Buffy looked back at the gaping hole that was the hellmouth and Sunnydale.

" I never want to see this place again, wherever Spike is, I just hope he's at rest now"

Buffy walked away , her head and heart heavy.

Down in the pit of hell, A swirl of light and dust gathered , picking up speed and density . The centre of the whirlwind burned and fused together to make form. A scream eminated from the form that was now dense and crackled , bone fused and flesh grew. The form struggled within the torrent of air , the face now completely healed and the body now had shape. Muscle and skin appeared and then the form slumped to the floor . Clothing took shape and the wind died , the figure stood , strong, flexed it's muscles and cracked bones back. Looking at it's surroundings, it laughed.

"Well now, wasn't that just a bloody riot! Never thought I'd find myself back in good ole soddin Sunnydale."

The figure pulled the duster around himself and climbed out of the hellmouth , never once looking back.

They stood by the car , Willow had no idea why Buffy wasn't getting in the car, all she wanted to do was get away from there as quickly as possible. Knowing that some of the Turok Hans had survived was a good enough reason alone, but Willow could still feel the negative energy that the hellmouth gave off.

Buffy just stared , she saw the flash of blonde and her eyes narrowed as she tried to focus better against the dark night. The sheen of leather in moonlight , then he stood tall, his duster billowing around him in the breeze, hands on hips as he surveyed the damage.

"Spike?"

He looked up and saw her

Willow looked up and gasped

"It can't be Buffy, it must be the First"

Buffy ignored her and ran.

"Spike!" she halted in front of him, only then did she take in Willows warning .

Buffy reached out and touched his cheek. He was solid, it was Spike. He had returned .

"Don't I even get a bloody hello Slayer?"

Tears ran down her face yet she laughed

"How ?" she asked , still stunned that he was there. In front of her.

"Wha' you asking me for? I was dead, all I know is um dead, pain then poof here I am, crawling me arse out of the bloody hell mouth "

"It's really you"

"Think we established that, you took a bash on the bonce or something ?"

He looked at her through narrow eyes and smirked

"Not even a pillar of fire can change you can it, you still as snarky as ever"

"I think that pillar of fire entitles me to be bloody snarky. I need to have a chat with that broody wanker for that. Reckon he knew what would happen"

"He was willing to wear it himself , if he knew what would happen then I doubt he'd do that"

"I guess your right, always was a selfish git"

Buffy sighed "Do we have to resort to bitchiness about Angel now? You've been back all of five minutes and he's been the topic of conversation for three of them"

Spike looked at Buffy and smiled "What else is there to talk about love?"

Buffy slapped his arm

"Ow"

"How about why it is you didn't believe me when I told you that I loved you"

"Buffy, Love " he took her in his arms and breathed out.

She rubbed her head against his firm chest and wrapped her arms around him tightly.

Buffy frowned and pushed herself away from him, alerting him and also Willow. Willow ran over to Buffy and caught her before she fell .

"What is it, Buffy what's wrong?" she asked , looking up at Spike.

Spike stood frowning at her "Buffy?"

"You, your not him , you can't be... " She looked up at Willow and then at Spike

"It is me you stupid bint.. for gods sake .. what the hell is wrong?"

"You have a heart beat" she answered shakily.


End file.
